The Chinese tea ceremony is a tradition that allows newlyweds to express gratitude to their parents and elders while formally acknowledging them by their new titles. It's also a moment when the elders offer blessings and gifts to the couple. If you're considering a Chinese tea ceremony as part of your wedding, we have compiled a comprehensive guide to help you plan this cherished ritual.
Timing and location
There are two popular practice in the modern day. The first option consists of a two-part ceremony, with the first part occurring at the bride's place after the groom picks her up, and the second part at the groom's home when he brings the bride back. This signifies the beginning of their shared journey and the formal introduction to the groom's family. The second option is a single unified ceremony at the reception venue, allowing for a more streamlined celebration.
Essential elements for the Ceremony
To execute a proper Chinese tea ceremony, you will need the following essential elements:
Tea - most Chinese teas, such as jasmine, will do. Optionally, you can add two lotus seeds per cup to symbolize fertility and blessings.
Tea cups and serving tray - ensure you have two cups per person. Disposable cups are acceptable. A serving tray to hold the cups. You can get them on amazon or large Asian supermarkets.
Helpers and MC - helpers assist in preparing the tea cups filled with teas. The MC controls the flow of the ceremony. Bridesmaids normally fill the role of helpers, and an elder female member of the family fill the role of the MC.
Chairs and cushions - chairs for the elders to sit on and cushions for the couple to kneel down when serving teas to the elders. It is acceptable to stand while serving teas to siblings and cousins.
Setting Up the Ceremony
The traditional setup involves the bride and groom kneeling while serving tea as a sign of respect to their elders. However, modern couples may choose to stand and bow while serving the tea. The bride typically stands or sits on the left of the groom. If you're using chairs, follow the same positioning, with the lady on the left and the gentleman on the right.
Tea serving order
Traditionally, the bride's family begins the tea ceremony, followed by the groom's family. However, it is essential to check with both sets of parents to ensure you honor their preferences. Within each family, the order of serving tea is determined by seniority, starting with the immediate parents and proceeding to the eldest family members. Here's a sample order:
Bride’s parents
Bride’s grandparents
Bride’s uncles and aunts
Bride’s older siblings
Bride’s older cousins
Groom’s parents
Groom’s grandparents
Groom’s uncles and aunts
Groom’s older siblings
Groom’s older cousins
Before serving the tea, the MC may share auspicious sayings with the couple and elders. Four cups of tea are prepared on a serving tray for the couple to pass to the elders. The groom addresses the male elder using their title, such as "Dad, please enjoy the tea," and serves them a cup of tea. The bride then follows suit, addressing the elder and serving the tea.
This process is repeated for the female elder. After enjoying the tea, the elder couple will offer their blessings and often present the newlyweds with gifts such as money or jewelries. The elder may place the jewelries on the couple immediately.
Summary
Incorporating a Chinese tea ceremony into your wedding day is a beautiful way to honor tradition, show respect to your parents and elders, and receive their blessings. By following the steps outlined in this comprehensive guide, you can ensure that your Chinese tea ceremony is a meaningful and smoothly executed part of your special day.